MEDIUM – Nov 14, 2023
My Mom Is Pushing 100 — Why Am I Still So Conflicted?
When I tell people that my mother will turn 100 this year, I get two kinds of responses. The first is along these lines:
“Bless her! You’re so lucky to have your mom!”
This sentiment is almost always from people who have never had a really, really, old parent. In order not to be perceived as a horrible human being, I respond, “Oh yes. I’m so lucky.”
The second response goes like this, “Oh my God! You must be exhausted!”
Just this week, my dentist asked, “Do you still have your mom?”
When I told him through packed gauze that I did, he said, “You must be drinking heavily.”
I love my dentist. also love my 99-year-old mother. I see her every week, talk to her every day, oversee her finances, and serve as her health proxy. I engaged her home health aides, though she fought me every step of the way. Bette Davis famously said, “Old age ain’t no place for sissies.” But she died when she was only 80. Ninety-nine is an entirely different story.